In the competitive modes, you get lots of customization options, a crapload of guns (PDZ's best feature), and computer-controlled bots to fill in the blanks for when you don't have enough human bodies.

Multiplayer, however, is a whole different story. That, my friends, is a quick-fix bandage for piss-poor level design. But the game knows you may get lost, so after a while, your HQ 'plots a course' for you, meaning it draws a big trail on the ground pointing you to where you're long overdue. But through a lot of the game, I was screaming, 'What the f*** am I supposed to be doing now?!?' and wandering about aimlessly in areas that I wasn't meant to go into at that time.

Now, I can appreciate nonlinear gameplay. Are these crazies playing the same game as me? This first-person shooter sticks to its 'futuristic James Bond' roots, so I didn't mind stuff like the cornball villains and dialogue. I'm not sure what upsets me more: the horrendous mess that is Perfect Dark Zero's singleplayer game or all the glowing reviews out there (including Che's).

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